Pick your restaurant carefully
There are restaurants which are more family friendly than others. Make sure they have a children's menu. That will at least tell you they welcome children.
Before you go through the door tell them what kind of behavior you want
Tell them they will have to stay in their chair. They can play with their toys on the table. They have to use their quiet voices.
Bring along a couple of table toys that will occupy them
Most family friendly restaurants will give children crayons and a picture to color but that is not enough to keep them occupied until the food arrives or after they are finished eating. Make sure you bring along a couple of table toys that will occupy them while the adults eat. You might consider having toys that are only for restaurants so they seem like a treat. Legos are a good choice as are other small puzzles and interactive toys. It is not a good idea to bring toys that make sounds as that is disturbing to others around you.
Make sure you are talking to them as well as the other adults you are with
Praise them periodically throughout the time you are in the restaurant for behaving nicely. Be specific, tell them you like the way they are sitting nicely, talk to them about the picture they are coloring or whatever activity they are doing to occupy themselves.
The restaurant should be known for fast service
Children have a hard time waiting for the food to arrive. Make sure they are not overly hungry when you arrive. You do not have to order a separate meal for them. Most children's meals are high in fat and short on nutrition and most young children will not eat an entire meal anyway. Ask for a small plate and share your food with them. They are more likely to eat it if they see you eating it.
Children will finish faster than adults
It is unreasonable to expect young children to sit for long periods while adults have coffee and conversation. If you know you are not going to have dessert go ahead and ask the wait person to bring your check as soon as your meal is served. That way when everyone is finished you don't have to sit and wait for the check.
When you leave the restaurant let them know how pleased you were with their behavior.
Enjoy your meal!
