Parents spend a lot of time, energy and money giving their children educational and enriching activities. There are many reasons for this but it mostly because we want our children to be ready for school and to be able to get into the best schools. There is also a lot of pressure from advertisers and the media trying to get parents to buy their products.

Children are showing behaviors that may be attributed to stress because they are seldom allowed to have free play. .

When they play with blocks parents constantly ask them "what color is this one?" Can you put on the red one?" rather than remarking on how high they are building or what a cool thing they are making.

Play is so important in a child's development that it has been recognized as a right of every child by the United Nations High Commission for Human Rights. In October 2006 the American Academy of Pediatrics put out a paper outlining the importance of play in a child's normal growth and development. The National Association for the Education of Young Children has a policy statement endorsing the importance of play.

This is not to say that parents should not spend time teaching their children colors, numbers and shapes but rather that it should be done in the form of play rather than flash cards, computer games and other rote drills.

Time for play can be found in everyday experiences. Taking a walk and letting your child discover nature. Going to the grocery store and letting your child guess which is heavier 6 apples or 5 bananas and then weighing them to see if your child is correct. Seeing how many different shapes your child can find while waiting in line.

Children learn when they are allowed to use their imaginations and generate their own play. They learn:

To Follow Rules	To Share	To Take Turns
To Be Empathetic	To Solve Problems	To Sort and Classify
To manage Stress	To Nurture Themselves and Others	To Test Their Limits
To Try Out Roles	To Communicate	To Negotiate
To Test New Skills	To Be Creative	To Solve Conflicts

Children soon learn that other children would rather play with them when they have these skills than if not. Research also shows that children learn these skills easier when they utilize them while playing with other children them rather than when they are told to use the skills by their parents.

Follow your child's lead, play what they want. Rather than always asking them questions or directing them, simply reflect on what they are doing. Try imitating their activity or just state what they are doing, for example, "You put the red black on the yellow block". Rather than asking what their picture is, say something like "Wow, look at all that red." or "Can you tell me about your picture?" This does two things, when you ask your child what they made you give the message that their art is not good because anyone can see it is a … When you ask them to tell you about what they made you get to expand your child's language skills as well as to encourage their creative abilities.

The bottom line is to have fun with your keiki. If they are having fun and you are talking with them and you do a variety of activities but you also let them play on their own part of each day your child is learning.